By: Brian Tracy
Listening is the Key
Listening builds self-esteem. It has been said that, "Rapt attention is the highest form of flattery." When you listen intently to another person and it is clear that you genuinely care about what that other person is saying, his or her self-esteem goes up. His or her feeling of personal value increases. He or she feels more worthwhile and important as a human being. You can actually make another person feel terrific about himself or herself by listening in a warm, genuine, caring way to everything he or she has to say.
Pay Close Attention
When a man and a woman go out for the first time, they spend an inordinate amount of time talking and listening to each other. They look into each other's eyes and hang on every word. They are each fascinated by the personality of the other. The more each listens to the other, the more positive and happy each of them feel and the stronger becomes the bonds of affection between them.
Focus 100% On the Other Person
The opposite of listening is ignoring. You always listen to that which you most value. You always ignore that which you devalue. The fastest way to turn a person off, to hurt their feelings and make them feel slighted and angry is to simply ignore what they are saying or interrupt them in the middle of a thought. Ignoring or interrupting is the equivalent of an emotional slap in the face. Men especially have to be careful about their natural desire to make a remark or an observation in the middle of a conversation. This can often cause the sales conversation to come to a grinding halt.
Action Exercises
First, take every opportunity to make the other person feel important by listening attentively to what he or she says.
Second, avoid interrupting the other person by slowing down and pausing for a few moments after he or she has stopped speaking.
-----
JACQUES' COMMENT:
Brian Tracy clearly shared a potent, yet easy to learn by practicing the precious "art" and "science" of sincerely, attentively LISTENING!
My Congratulations and Thanks for this!
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Dreams Into Realities...
"Dreams never hurt anybody if he keeps working right behind the dream to make as much of it become real as he can."
- Frank Woolworth, Entrepreneur
"Wisdom is knowing what to do; virtue is doing it."
- David Jordan, scientist
"Courage is rarely reckless or foolish. Courage usually involves a highly realistic estimate of the odds that must be faced."
- Margaret Truman, author
"A clear vision, backed by definite plans, gives you a tremendous feeling of confidence and personal power."
- Brian Tracy, Author
"Your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other one thing."
- Abraham Lincoln, 16th U.S. president
- Frank Woolworth, Entrepreneur
"Wisdom is knowing what to do; virtue is doing it."
- David Jordan, scientist
"Courage is rarely reckless or foolish. Courage usually involves a highly realistic estimate of the odds that must be faced."
- Margaret Truman, author
"A clear vision, backed by definite plans, gives you a tremendous feeling of confidence and personal power."
- Brian Tracy, Author
"Your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other one thing."
- Abraham Lincoln, 16th U.S. president
Friday, July 2, 2010
Bad luck or good luck, who can say?
There once was very poor man living in a village who had a
very fine horse. So fine, in fact, that the lord of the castle
wanted to buy it. But the old man always refused.
"To me this horse is not merely an animal. He's a friend.
How could I sell you my friend?"
One morning he went to the stable and found his horse gone.
All the villagers said, "We told you! You should have sold
your horse. Now he's been stolen instead. What terrible luck."
"Bad luck or good luck," the old man said. "Who can say?"
Everyone laughed at him. But 15 days later the horse returned,
followed by a whole herd of wild horses. He had escaped from the
stable, courted a young mare, and returned with the rest of
the herd following behind!
"What luck!" the villagers cried.
The old man and his son began training the wild horses. But
a week later the man's son broke his leg trying to train one of
the horses.
"Bad luck," said his friends. "What are you going to do now
without your son to help you? You who are already so poor."
"Bad luck, good luck, who can say?" the old man replied.
A few days later an army belonging to the lord of the land
passed through the village and forced all the young men to become
soldiers. All... except the old man's son, because of his broken
leg.
"How lucky you are," the villagers cried. "All our children
are gone to war, but you've been able to keep your son. Our sons
will probably be killed..."
The old man replied, "Bad luck, good luck... who can say?"
The future comes to us in bits and pieces. We never know what
lies in store for us. But if you always maintain a positive
attitude the doors of chance remain open, and you will be a
happier person.
-----
Courtesy: Christian Godefroy
"Luck is the sense to recognize an opportunity and the ability to take advantage of it."
- Samuel Goldwyn, entertainment executive
very fine horse. So fine, in fact, that the lord of the castle
wanted to buy it. But the old man always refused.
"To me this horse is not merely an animal. He's a friend.
How could I sell you my friend?"
One morning he went to the stable and found his horse gone.
All the villagers said, "We told you! You should have sold
your horse. Now he's been stolen instead. What terrible luck."
"Bad luck or good luck," the old man said. "Who can say?"
Everyone laughed at him. But 15 days later the horse returned,
followed by a whole herd of wild horses. He had escaped from the
stable, courted a young mare, and returned with the rest of
the herd following behind!
"What luck!" the villagers cried.
The old man and his son began training the wild horses. But
a week later the man's son broke his leg trying to train one of
the horses.
"Bad luck," said his friends. "What are you going to do now
without your son to help you? You who are already so poor."
"Bad luck, good luck, who can say?" the old man replied.
A few days later an army belonging to the lord of the land
passed through the village and forced all the young men to become
soldiers. All... except the old man's son, because of his broken
leg.
"How lucky you are," the villagers cried. "All our children
are gone to war, but you've been able to keep your son. Our sons
will probably be killed..."
The old man replied, "Bad luck, good luck... who can say?"
The future comes to us in bits and pieces. We never know what
lies in store for us. But if you always maintain a positive
attitude the doors of chance remain open, and you will be a
happier person.
-----
Courtesy: Christian Godefroy
"Luck is the sense to recognize an opportunity and the ability to take advantage of it."
- Samuel Goldwyn, entertainment executive
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
The $20 bill
A well known speaker started off his seminar by holding up
a $20 bill. In the room of 200, he asked:
"Who would like this $20 bill?"
Hands started going up. He said:
"I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first,
let me do this."
He proceeded to crumple the dollar bill up.
He then asked:
"Who still wants it?"
Still the hands were up in the air.
"Well," he replied, "what if I do this?"
And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into
the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.
"Now who still wants it?" Still the hands went into the air.
"My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson.
No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because
it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20.
Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground
into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that
come our way. We feel as though we are worthless.
But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you
will never lose your value. To those who love you, you are
priceless.
The worth of our lives come not in what we do or who we know
but by who we are!"
-----
Today's gem from my friend Christian Godefroy.
a $20 bill. In the room of 200, he asked:
"Who would like this $20 bill?"
Hands started going up. He said:
"I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first,
let me do this."
He proceeded to crumple the dollar bill up.
He then asked:
"Who still wants it?"
Still the hands were up in the air.
"Well," he replied, "what if I do this?"
And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into
the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.
"Now who still wants it?" Still the hands went into the air.
"My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson.
No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because
it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20.
Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground
into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that
come our way. We feel as though we are worthless.
But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you
will never lose your value. To those who love you, you are
priceless.
The worth of our lives come not in what we do or who we know
but by who we are!"
-----
Today's gem from my friend Christian Godefroy.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
The triple Test
In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in
high esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher
and said, "Do you know what I just heard about your friend?"
"Hold on a minute," Socrates replied. "Before telling me
anything, I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the
Triple Filter Test."
"Triple filter?"
"That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about
my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what
you're going to say. That's why I call it the triple filter test.
The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what
you are about to tell me is true?"
"No," the man said, "Actually I just heard about it and..."
"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's
true or not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of
goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend
something good?"
"No, on the contrary..."
"So," Socrates continued, "You want to tell me something bad
about him, but you're not certain it's true. You may still pass
the test though, because there's one filter left: the filter of
usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to
be useful to me?"
"No, not really."
"Well," concluded Socrates, "If what you want to tell me is
neither true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?"
Courtesy: Christian Godefroy
high esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher
and said, "Do you know what I just heard about your friend?"
"Hold on a minute," Socrates replied. "Before telling me
anything, I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the
Triple Filter Test."
"Triple filter?"
"That's right," Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about
my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what
you're going to say. That's why I call it the triple filter test.
The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what
you are about to tell me is true?"
"No," the man said, "Actually I just heard about it and..."
"All right," said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's
true or not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of
goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend
something good?"
"No, on the contrary..."
"So," Socrates continued, "You want to tell me something bad
about him, but you're not certain it's true. You may still pass
the test though, because there's one filter left: the filter of
usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to
be useful to me?"
"No, not really."
"Well," concluded Socrates, "If what you want to tell me is
neither true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?"
Courtesy: Christian Godefroy
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
TIME is Money...and Much More!
"While it is reprehensible to cheat , "con", steal money or "stuff" from another, nevertheless if the injured party is reasonably healthy, they can always "pick themselves up, dust themselves off and start over again", as it says in the song. Perhaps even receive compensation from their Insurance Company, if the latter is honorable.
To waste or steal the Time of another, however, is totally unforgiveable as even the wealthiest person on earth could not buy a minute or a second of Time if their life depended on it.
This principle is especially valid in the case of an appointment, date or other Time-related Commitment made to another, then rudely and irresponsibly delayed or unkept without first alerting the waiting party."
The above and many other good character, moral, ethical, common courtesy, decency, consideration, and respect (re)builders of all sorts are the subject of my upcoming book, "Promises...Promises...Promises..." (for those who say "yes!" too readily: How to make Less and Keep All of them).
It is a new, challenging guide on simply treating others the way you like being treated yourself (or should), and is the Psychological Imperative of becoming a habitual, automatic Promise Keeper: one whose Word, once given, is his/her personal Universe...a "fait accompli (a done deal)..."money in the Bank"!
Just imagine living in a World of punctual, reliable, dependable Promise Keepers, with You as a shining example who Always honors the value of others' Time!
Jacques Girard, Ph.D., C.Ht.
"Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Louis Pasteur, Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson and Albert Einstein."
- Jackson Brown Jr., writer
"Someone might have a germ of talent, but 90% of it is discipline and how you practice it, what you do with it. Instinct won't carry you through the entire journey. It's what you do in the moments between inspiration."
- Cate Blanchett, actress
..............................................................
The value of time:
To understand the value of a year, talk to a student who has
failed an important exam.
To understand the value of a month, talk to a mother who has
given birth to a baby a month prematurely.
To understand the value of a week, talk to the publisher of a
weekly newspaper.
To understand the value of an hour, talk to a couple in love
who are separated and want only to be together again.
To understand the value of a minute, talk to someone who has
just missed a train or a plane.
To understand the value of a second, talk to someone who has
lost a loved one in an accident.
To understand the value of a millisecond, talk to someone who
won a silver medal at the Olympic Games.
Time waits for no one. Gather all the time you have left every
moment, and it will be of great use to you. Share it with people
you value and love and it will become even more precious.
To waste or steal the Time of another, however, is totally unforgiveable as even the wealthiest person on earth could not buy a minute or a second of Time if their life depended on it.
This principle is especially valid in the case of an appointment, date or other Time-related Commitment made to another, then rudely and irresponsibly delayed or unkept without first alerting the waiting party."
The above and many other good character, moral, ethical, common courtesy, decency, consideration, and respect (re)builders of all sorts are the subject of my upcoming book, "Promises...Promises...Promises..." (for those who say "yes!" too readily: How to make Less and Keep All of them).
It is a new, challenging guide on simply treating others the way you like being treated yourself (or should), and is the Psychological Imperative of becoming a habitual, automatic Promise Keeper: one whose Word, once given, is his/her personal Universe...a "fait accompli (a done deal)..."money in the Bank"!
Just imagine living in a World of punctual, reliable, dependable Promise Keepers, with You as a shining example who Always honors the value of others' Time!
Jacques Girard, Ph.D., C.Ht.
"Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Louis Pasteur, Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson and Albert Einstein."
- Jackson Brown Jr., writer
"Someone might have a germ of talent, but 90% of it is discipline and how you practice it, what you do with it. Instinct won't carry you through the entire journey. It's what you do in the moments between inspiration."
- Cate Blanchett, actress
..............................................................
The value of time:
To understand the value of a year, talk to a student who has
failed an important exam.
To understand the value of a month, talk to a mother who has
given birth to a baby a month prematurely.
To understand the value of a week, talk to the publisher of a
weekly newspaper.
To understand the value of an hour, talk to a couple in love
who are separated and want only to be together again.
To understand the value of a minute, talk to someone who has
just missed a train or a plane.
To understand the value of a second, talk to someone who has
lost a loved one in an accident.
To understand the value of a millisecond, talk to someone who
won a silver medal at the Olympic Games.
Time waits for no one. Gather all the time you have left every
moment, and it will be of great use to you. Share it with people
you value and love and it will become even more precious.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
What are the Big stones in Your Life?
One day, an old professor of the national School of
administration (ENA-France) was asked to give a training course on
the effective economic planning of one's time to a group of about
fifteen leaders of big companies from North America.
This course constituted one of 5 workshops of their day of
training. So, the old Prof. only had one hour to spend on this
subject.
Standing in front of this group of elite who was ready
to note everything that the expert was going to teach, the old
Prof. looked at them one by one, slowly, then said to them:
"We are going to make an experiment".
From under the table which separated him from his pupils,
the old Prof. took out an immense gallon Mason jar (glass jar of more
than 4 liters) which he directly put in front of him.
Then, he took out about a dozen pebbles roughly as big as
tennis balls and placed them delicately, one by one, in the
big jar. When the jar was filled up to the brim, and when it was
impossible to add anything to it, he raised slowly his eyes
towards the pupils, and asked them:
"Is this jar full?"
Everybody answered: "Yes".
He waited for a few seconds and added: "Really?"
Then, he bent again and took out from under the table a pot
filled with little stones. With accuracy, he poured these little
pebbles on the big stones, then moved softly the jar.
The fragments of little pebbles went between the stones
down to the bottom of the jar. The old Prof. raised his eyes again
towards his audience and asked:
"Is this jar full?".
This time, his brilliant pupils began to understand the whole
process. One of them answered:
"Probably not!"
"Well!" answered the old Prof..
He bent again and this time, took out from under the table a
bucket of sand. With attention, he poured the sand into the jar.
The sand went to fil the spaces between the big big stones and the
little pebbles. Once again, he asked:
"Is this jar full?". This time, without hesitation, and in a
choir, the brilliant pupils answered:
"No!".
"Well!" answered the old Prof. And, as expected by the
brilliant pupils, he took the jug of water which was on the table
and filled the jar up to the brim. Then, the old Prof. raised
his eyes towards his group and asked:
"Which big truth does this experiment show to us?" .
Being no fool, the most audacious of the pupils, thinking
about the topic of this course, answered:
"It shows that even when one believes that our diary is
completely filled, if one wants really wants it, one can add
more meetings to it, more things to be made".
The old Prof. answered. "It is not that".
"The big truth that this experiment shows to us is the following
one:
- "If one does not put the big stones first in the jar, one
will never be able to make all of them go in, then".
There was a profound silence, each becoming aware of the
evidence of these comments.
Then, the old Prof. Told them: "Which are the big stones
in your life?"
"Your health?"
"Your family?"
"Your friends?"
"To make your dreams come true?"
"Learning?"
"To do what you enjoy?"
"To relax?"
"To fight for a cause?"
"To take time for yourself?"
"Or any other thing?"
"What it is necessary to remember is the importance to put
one's BIG STONES in first in one's life, otherwise one encouters
the risks not to succeed in one's life.
If one gives priority to pecadilloes (the little pebbles, the
sand), one will fill one's life with pecadilloes and one will
have no more enough precious time to dedicate to the important
elements of one's life".
Then do not forget to ask to yourself this question:
"Which are the BIG STONES IN MY LIFE?
Then, put them in, first"
With a friendly gesture of the hand, the old professor
greeted his audience and slowly left the room.
What are the BIG STONES in your life, Jacques?
-----
This was today's message from my wise friend Christian Godefroy. Probably you noticed his French phrase turnings. You may reach him at:
http://www.Psoitive-Club.com
Hope you enjoyed and learned from this post. All my Best wishes,
Your Friend,
Jacques
administration (ENA-France) was asked to give a training course on
the effective economic planning of one's time to a group of about
fifteen leaders of big companies from North America.
This course constituted one of 5 workshops of their day of
training. So, the old Prof. only had one hour to spend on this
subject.
Standing in front of this group of elite who was ready
to note everything that the expert was going to teach, the old
Prof. looked at them one by one, slowly, then said to them:
"We are going to make an experiment".
From under the table which separated him from his pupils,
the old Prof. took out an immense gallon Mason jar (glass jar of more
than 4 liters) which he directly put in front of him.
Then, he took out about a dozen pebbles roughly as big as
tennis balls and placed them delicately, one by one, in the
big jar. When the jar was filled up to the brim, and when it was
impossible to add anything to it, he raised slowly his eyes
towards the pupils, and asked them:
"Is this jar full?"
Everybody answered: "Yes".
He waited for a few seconds and added: "Really?"
Then, he bent again and took out from under the table a pot
filled with little stones. With accuracy, he poured these little
pebbles on the big stones, then moved softly the jar.
The fragments of little pebbles went between the stones
down to the bottom of the jar. The old Prof. raised his eyes again
towards his audience and asked:
"Is this jar full?".
This time, his brilliant pupils began to understand the whole
process. One of them answered:
"Probably not!"
"Well!" answered the old Prof..
He bent again and this time, took out from under the table a
bucket of sand. With attention, he poured the sand into the jar.
The sand went to fil the spaces between the big big stones and the
little pebbles. Once again, he asked:
"Is this jar full?". This time, without hesitation, and in a
choir, the brilliant pupils answered:
"No!".
"Well!" answered the old Prof. And, as expected by the
brilliant pupils, he took the jug of water which was on the table
and filled the jar up to the brim. Then, the old Prof. raised
his eyes towards his group and asked:
"Which big truth does this experiment show to us?" .
Being no fool, the most audacious of the pupils, thinking
about the topic of this course, answered:
"It shows that even when one believes that our diary is
completely filled, if one wants really wants it, one can add
more meetings to it, more things to be made".
The old Prof. answered. "It is not that".
"The big truth that this experiment shows to us is the following
one:
- "If one does not put the big stones first in the jar, one
will never be able to make all of them go in, then".
There was a profound silence, each becoming aware of the
evidence of these comments.
Then, the old Prof. Told them: "Which are the big stones
in your life?"
"Your health?"
"Your family?"
"Your friends?"
"To make your dreams come true?"
"Learning?"
"To do what you enjoy?"
"To relax?"
"To fight for a cause?"
"To take time for yourself?"
"Or any other thing?"
"What it is necessary to remember is the importance to put
one's BIG STONES in first in one's life, otherwise one encouters
the risks not to succeed in one's life.
If one gives priority to pecadilloes (the little pebbles, the
sand), one will fill one's life with pecadilloes and one will
have no more enough precious time to dedicate to the important
elements of one's life".
Then do not forget to ask to yourself this question:
"Which are the BIG STONES IN MY LIFE?
Then, put them in, first"
With a friendly gesture of the hand, the old professor
greeted his audience and slowly left the room.
What are the BIG STONES in your life, Jacques?
-----
This was today's message from my wise friend Christian Godefroy. Probably you noticed his French phrase turnings. You may reach him at:
http://www.Psoitive-Club.com
Hope you enjoyed and learned from this post. All my Best wishes,
Your Friend,
Jacques
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